Dear Yogesh,

My name is Usha, I work as a General Manager in an MNC in Mumbai. Recently, while on a call I spoke to an employee rudely. Since that incident, a feeling of guilt has been growing inside me. I realized how unsympathetic and demanding I must have sounded to him. This made me immediately aware that I need some help.

There are some issues going on in my personal life that make me depressed and easily annoyed. I am beginning to get impatient with my employees and this is affecting my work too.

I hope you can advise me on how to avoid my personal issues influencing my professional life.

Regards,

Usha

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Dear Usha,

I am sorry to hear that you are facing such a hard time. Please do not judge yourself too harshly. These are already difficult times with the COVID-19 pandemic going on. You need a cool head to manage this situation, and always remember, every problem comes with its own solutions, you just have to find it.

The first thing you should do is, contact your employee and apologize for having a bad moment. This could relieve you of your guilt in a short term. In the long run, it is important to understand the issues that push you into this disturbed state of mind. Mostly, we get disturbed or dissatisfied due to the needs (in some or other forms) not getting fulfilled. This dissatisfaction, at the back of the mind, can be a major reason for your ongoing and increasing frustration.

If you can identify your personal issue as the issue of a need, then ask yourself, how you can get it met in a new way. Ask your friends and family for help. Getting your needs properly met is not optional, it is something you must achieve to be the person you want to, be and for having the life you want.

You may be overcompensating too much in your personal life. Ask yourself, what am I putting up with? Make a list of it and figure out what you can fix or ask someone else to fix it, who understands you well enough. Remember, time and situations are never constant.

You will surely come out of these difficult times.

Good luck to you!

Best,

Yogesh Sood

This blog is an adaptation of a blog written by Madeleine Homan Blanchard on October 10th, 2020 https://resources.kenblanchard.com/blanchard-leaderchat/concerned-you-re-becoming-impatient-with-your-employees-ask-madeleine